I made this little list I have hanging over my desk with all the things standing between me and freedom. I didn't want to deal with going to New York so I just sent my passport to a visa service. Hopefully no more crazy Swine flu stuff like last year. Ahh I'm so ready to be in Asia again. And so tempted to visit friends in Thailand, Korea, Japan? Or just go by myself to Hanoi or Manila? Shopping in Hong Kong? I may never come back...

Papers and forms and studying are all underway. The motivation is very low.

I'm embracing humility. embracing humility. I'd like to get to the point where I can love each part of myself-- even the parts I hate, am embarrassed by etc.. George told me about a conversation Eve Ensler had with a 74-year-old Masai woman about whether she loves her body:

Do I like my body? Do I like my body? I love my body. God made this body. God gave me this body. My fingers, look at my fingers. I love my fingernails, little crescent moons. They lead right up to my arms--so strong--they carry things along. Nad my legs, my legs are long. Masai people, we are tall, I get there fast, my legs can wrap around a man and hold him there.

It's never occurred to her that she should not like her body. I wonder if I would be like that I'd grown up in the bush without access to Victoria's Secret fashion shows? This woman lives in her body and respects it for all the wonderful things it does for her. I would like to get to the point where I can say all these things she's saying about her physical body and believe them. Emotional, spiritual body too. I'd like to say "I know who you are and I love you. I accept you" to all these pieces of me.